come and steal my pain away....
Posted by krissy at 7:45 AM
I walked across an empty land
I knew the pathway like the back of my hand
I felt the earth beneath my feet
Sat by the river and it made me complete
Oh simple thing where have you gone
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin
I came across a fallen tree
I felt the branches of it looking at me
Is this the place we used to love?
Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?
Oh simple thing where have you gone
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin
And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?
Oh simple thing where have you gone
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin
So if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
So why don't we go
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?
Posted by krissy at 4:00 PM
Jacquelyn.
Jackielyn.
Whatever the spelling of her name is, it doesn't change the fact that she exists and she is being loved.
I am Envious. Bitter. Angry. For she received everything I wanted from someone who didn't give a damn.
Makes me think what she has that I didn't have. Sh*t.
Posted by krissy at 10:49 AM
I met a friend whom I haven't spend time with for a long time, and it was extra special because this would probably the first time we hang out together all by ourselves - and it was a blast, really! I didn't plan on anything, plus I figured that we would only stroll around the mall, checking out every shop. Yes, we all did that and we had fun more than I ever imagined it to be. You know why? Urbandub! Woohoo! It was a delight to see them perform live, only a few meters away from us. The good thing was there were only a few people inside the fence so it was not crowded at all. Even they sang only five of their songs and was a bit bitin, the new cd I bought was totally worth it! Hearing their music was like getting high, without the drugs, and it was a good kind of high. Shet! I have been long wanting to hear Gabby's voice and it just happened. Am I sensing spontainiety? I think I am! And I am looovvviiing it! A good break from my ever monotonous life. Thank you Gabby, Lalay, John and Jan-Jan!
On the other hand, I would like to apologize to my HS friends for trading the chance to hang out with you, with watching Urbandub. I can't even bring myself to say sorry, because I am not at least sorry in any way. Uh-oh! But I promise to plan, arrange and actually attend our next get together. Hehehe! Sowi!
Moving on. Right now, I feel like a whole new person. I think I look less naive and shy. For the first time in my life, I think that my semi-bitchings match my new mataray looks. Or so I think. Haha!
Another thing. While I was too absorbed in watching Urbandub, someone caught my attention. He was classmate of mine from elementary that I had a little chat with in one of my ride home. The funny thing is, I didn't speak to him when we were in the same school. But now, all of a sudden, I start seeing him again in different places, and talking, feeling like we've been talking for ages! He is a cool guy - cool because he likes the same music as I do. He is not the usual guy. He's nice and very fun to talk to. Haaay! I don't want to say anything more. It may ruin our future together! Hahaha!
Libre mangarap. Dream on krissy!
Posted by krissy at 11:19 PM
No words can possibly describe the fulfillment I’m feeling over the past weekend and the day after. I didn’t quite expect that the trip would be that fun and liberating at the same time, liberating in the sense that it was my first overnight out of town trip with friends from college. Imagine buying fresh squid and fish and having them grilled by the native folks, and actually eat them for a late dinner. Eating on a torn Styrofoam with a single utensil was quite challenging especially if you were feasting on large chunks of squid, plus getting all the squid fibers stuck in between your teeth. Hahaha! Oh, I almost forgot, flying cockroaches were all over the place, making the dinner more appealing.
The next day was even better! We toured the islands, saw different features of the sea, and trekked one of the island to gain a better view of the place. Alas, we settled in one of the islands where the beach sand was quite abundant to accommodate us. Let me tell you, the sand was actually gorgeous and the waters were amazingly clear. Once we got there, we were so ecstatic that we quickly immerse ourselves in the sparkling water. The only thing that kept us away from swimming in the waters was brunch. It was almost ten in the morning and we haven’t eaten anything, so we just cannot resist the food. After finishing brunch, we went back to the waters, rented a life vest so that we can move away from the shore, to the deep parts of the sea. This was where the fun part began. With Francine’s expertise in swimming/diving, we were able to see fishes! Three yellow and black striped fishes, one small “dory,” a school of dilis-like fishes and colorful corals, we have seen them all underwater. We kept on diving and diving to see these wonders. It was heaven under the sea! Did I make any sense? Haha! Before we left, we explored away from the shore, and swam until we were in really, really deep waters. The experience was truly invigorating, even thought the travel back here was tiring.
The day after, we went to Kapitolyo, Pasig to search for sources for our term paper, which is due on Thursday. It was Monday already, and we haven’t started anything at all, so I readied myself for another cramming marathon. After getting our resources, we all went back to our respective homes. Standing in the bus all alone, with my phone out of battery, leaving me with no means to talk with someone and denying me a fm radio transmittance, I just drowned myself with thoughts of planning my schedule and complaining to myself how unfortunate my constant travel is. It is not that I am not comfortable whenever I travel, but it is because of the lack of dazzling faces I so love to see. Until I stepped out of the bus and started to walk towards the van station, I kept on whining to myself. I kept on complaining how many desirable men are out there, and yet I don’t see a single one of them in any of the rides I had.
When I arrived at the van station and realized that it was already full, I made my way to the next van. In a split second I saw this guy, and I tell you he was stunning. What excited me even more was that I quickly realized he was a former classmate of mine from elementary, a seatmate to be more specific, and uhmm, had a bit of a history together. I was totally shocked that he grew up like that. To top it all, we sat together in front with the driver. Imagine 45 minutes in that spot with him just a few inches away. Ahhh, 45 minutes of pure ecstasy! Hahaha! Just when my rantings where reaching their highest level, I receive this? Wow, the hands of fate is favoring me this time! Oh, I wouldn’t mind living with this kind of luck. Please go on, make me happy, make my days!
Posted by krissy at 4:55 PM
Parang kelan lang, karir na karir (sa pagka-cram) ang pag-aaral sa STS. Hehe!
It has been proven that whenever I am in a situation that is too hard for me to handle, or the pressures were just to demanding, or simply I lack the motivation to work my ass off (read: KATAMARAN), I detach myself from the things I should be doing, the responsibilities I am obliged to take care of, and from the people connected to the situation I am so desperately trying to avoid.
Two years ago, I slowly drifted away from certain people. These people were undeniably precious and very close to my heart and whom I've spent a lot of memorable occasions with. Then something utterly painful happened. I reacted the only possible way I know - detaching myself away. I withdrew myself from the whole experience, including from my precious friends. With all the sanity that was left in me, I tried to suppress every damn memory I had, every one of them, even the most blissfully perfect moments. I did so, even though it was against my personal will. I did it because I was too hurt and wrecked, such that I need to breathe everything out of my system in a single blow. Seeing my friends meant reliving each devastating experience, and I can't withstand that. Funny it is that when I was in the process of excluding myself from them, I felt nothing - no pain, no anything. I found leaving them totally easy, as if I didn't care for them after all. Talk about being a horrible person that I am, leaving, ignoring and taking for granted my so-called-friends.
Call it pathetic, but giving myself time to just sit down and relax, and think of nothing during work demanding days, gives me a sense of balance from everything, like a gust of fresh air and just enough to gather myself and save motivation and energy.
On the other side of that, I am missing important events, requirements, and disappointing people who trust in me. Even if I work my best to regain what I’ve lost, at some point of time, I will automatically detach myself again, creating a round of this vicious, vicious cycle. Sometimes I wonder why I feel this way ? in a certain moment, I am this achiever who stops at nothing and gives her best shot at each opportunity, but in a snap, transforms into a lazy bum, oblivious to the world around her. What I need right now is a major habit breaking phenomena, powerful enough to finally scare me from going back to that tormenting cycle.
Posted by krissy at 2:23 PM
Did you ever wish that you could pull the hands of time, to somehow make long hours go faster?
I can't sleep, wishing that tomorrow would be now, hoping that I would receive that phone call this instant, to end all my misery.
It's just too bad that I am watching every single second pass me by, waiting impatiently for that moment, only in the end hearing the words I've been dreading to hear.
Beats me how will I react? Would I cry? Most probably. After I have given so much effort and time to it, it will just dissolve into nothingness.
Wish me luck.
Posted by krissy at 11:36 PM
Parang kelan lang, karir na karir (sa pagka-cram) ang pag-aaral sa STS. Hehe!