It is all in -the mess-.

I miss them all - my high school tropa, ryan, francine, dette, tricia, rox, kris, verna, sharon, may, bernadette, LEAH and HIM!

Yeah, I know distance makes you miss those people. You'll remember all those times you've shared, whether they were funny, serious or even irritating. And what made missing those people worse was that I have all the time in the world! Meaning, I have all the time to think and have nothing to think about, leaving me staring into space and think of them. Haayyyy, nabobore na talaga ako! I want to do something, to make my time more useful and productive! Now that I am officially a BUM, all I am accomplishing is gaining more weight each day.

Going back to the "missing-someone" topic. I realized lately that the worst way to miss someone is having the chance to actually be with him physically but not having that connection. It is like he is so near, yet he is so far at the same time. No matter how hard I try to reach out, it still won't work! Honestly, I hate losing and failing. I believe that in all things that I do, I should give my best, even in these kind of situations. But now, I am totally losing this fight! I don't know when to hope and when to give up. The sad thing is that I don't want to give up, because I want to make this work, but I feel that I am fighting this battle all by myself when he should have been with me all along.

YOU know what? I am sick and tired of waiting for you. But then again, I still refuse to let you go because I believe anything less than mad, passionate, extraordinary (even in enduring extreme agony) is a waste of one's time. There are too many mediocre things in this world and it should not be one of them.

Btw, I missed you today.
And tonignt, I still do.

Posted by krissy at 11:57 PM

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What I think

When I know things are not meant for me, I learn to let go. It doesn't mean I'm weak, I'm just showing how strong I am - to fight the urge of wanting something I'm not supposed to have.

That thing, that moment when you kiss someone, everything around you becomes hazy. And the only thing in focus is you and this person. You realize that this person is the person you're supposed to kiss for the rest of your life. And for one moment, you get this amazing gift, and you want to laugh, you want to cry because you feel so lucky that you have found it and so scared that it will go away all at the same time. - Drew Barrymore from the movie Never Been Kissed

Found it? Shout it.

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